Photo Credit: Phil Wayes
Showing posts with label imported post. Show all posts
Showing posts with label imported post. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Burning Girl

(Still no internet. Am posting from Mr. Sozeberg's computer; thanks, Keyser! I wrote this post earlier today on my home computer).

It's my first full day here in my new condo, and I have the day off. With no internet to use as my time-suck, the day has been spent grocery shopping, unpacking, and re-acquainting myself with my DVD collection.

Among the [many] DVDs I watched today, one of them was PADV's 2004 fall concert-- my second concert with the company. The final piece was Returning (the company's signature work), and as I watched it, two things stuck in my mind:
1. Holy damn, I looked totally different five years ago.
2. I danced with so much joy.
The second one kind of bugged me. "I danced with so much joy." I wondered, Do I still dance with that amount of happiness now? Probably not. Why? I mean, that was five years ago, and I made my living from dance; the same can be said today. So what's the difference between then and now?
I thought about it for a while, and the best answer that I can come up with is that... back then, it was a whole new world for me. It was my first apprenticeship, I had been with the company for seven months, I loved everything about it-- the people, the dances, the studio, everything. The senior-year struggle of Trying To Get Into A Company was over, I loved my new life, it was time to just kick back and enjoy it.

Note from the future: It doesn't last. About nine months to a year after you sign your first contract, a little voice creeps into your head, taps your skull, and whispers "Wake up, dollface. The honeymoon's over." And then all of a sudden you're worrying about your career, about your place in your career, if you're moving up fast enough, if you're doing enough, if you're getting enough stage time and how much you've added to your resume. And then you're going on endless auditions and interviews and guesting all over the place and dancing in multiple companies at once. Eventually, the burnout hits you.

It didn't hit me until last season, but it hit me hard. HARD. To the point where putting on a leotard and tights was less desirable than flossing my teeth with barbed wire. I had a wonderful experience working on Alice in Wonderland, but that was pretty much the extent of my joy. For the most part, the career that I busted my ass to even ATTAIN was causing me nothing but stress and angst.

So: I took the summer off. I enjoyed time with my best friend, I read a lot, I watched comedy and laughed my obnoxious shrieky-sounding laugh. I did some soul-searching and remembered why I loved to dance in the first place; why I chose to make this my career. I went back to ballet classes and reconnected with my dance buddies. And then I asked our company director if she wanted me to dance with her this season and talked about class schedules with the studio director. A week ago, I returned to dancing as a much happier dancer.

Usually, my dance-oriented goals involve performing a lot, getting roles, teaching well, and choreographing good dances. After watching that footage today, my new goal is to dance with the same amount of overflowing joy as I did on that DVD.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Video blog from UC Davis Intensive: 2,000 Miles & No Sleep

Edit: Now you can watch the
videos here!
T
his video is pretty hilarious-- I hadn't slept and had spent 7 hours on a plane. Yeeeeeeah.

Friday, July 11, 2008

A Mile Deep and a Foot Wide

I know I am not the only dancer who routinely spreads themselves way, way too thin (although I certainly do it the least gracefully). Many dancers are overachievers, perfectionists, and highly adverse to monotony and/or mediocrity. Not only do we do A LOT, but we have to do it all REALLY WELL if not the best. You'd think that I/we should by now have learned that that's very difficult (if not impossible) to accomplish. But no. This is my lesson for the day.

And you, my faithful readers, deserve a better post than this. Allow me to direct you to some dance blogs that aren't written by spazbaskets approaching critical mass:
A Dancer's Guide: How to Decide on a College Program - Invaluable advice for any dancer considering further dance education. Even better, it's written by a fellow Houston dancer!
Scandal: Plagiarism - There are some lazy, unscrupulous people who call themselves "choreographers." NY teacher and choreographer Matthew Neff shares his experience of an encounter with such a person.
Summer Intensive from the Inside
- An administrative associate at Houston Ballet's Ben Stevenson Academy shares the view from the office at one of the USA's top summer programs. It's an interesting perspective, especially after you've seen many, many summer dance intensives from only the "student" perspective.
Stefanie Wilder-Taylor's
open letter and subsequent response that comprise her two most recent posts. This has nothing to do with dance in the slightest, but SW-T is brilliant and hilarious and should be read by everyone.

Read those until I go back to being interesting. It will be soon, I hope.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Tales of a Rookie Dance- Ensemble Director

Today I received the one Freebie that God grants to every choreographer: I had a dance happen by accident. The choreography finished and cleaned itself. I think that happens once in a lifetime every dance- maker, and I'm eternally thankful that I got mine today.

In all seriousness, I'm happy with Building Nothing 2.0. In my mind, it's not finished-- there is so much more that I want to add to it, choreographically and conceptually-- but time got away from us. Still, I love the changes that were made, the footage from today looks great, and we're excited to present this newer version of our piece this coming weekend.

Our fundraiser and rep showing is three days, and I'm knee-deep in last-minute preparations. Although we're looking to fund our upcoming performances both in Houston and on the road, the director of Butterfly Dance Ensemble (e.g. yours truly) is accepting any and all donations of sanity. We're a new company, I'm a rookie director. I'm still learning the ropes and I finished a major show barely three days ago, so you can guess where this is going: THINGS ARE CHAOTIC.

As much as I'd like to tell you more about Life In The Process, most of my brain cells have already jumped ship and I need to quit blog-stalling and get back to work. I'll make this quick: Here's what my office looks like right now:


P.S. Here's your Lesson Of The Day: The words "Windows Vista" and "film-editing software" should never be used in the same sentence unless you want to spend two hours head-desking. I learned this the hard way.

Friday, May 2, 2008

This is relevant in a very roundabout way

Harry Potter will not appear on the New York Times Bestseller list next week for the first time in nine and a half years. It debuted on the list on December 27, 1998.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Returning

I have had, as predicted, had the most amazing weekend ever.
Here are some of the highlights:
- riding to the airport in a Mercedes Stretch SUV with my dancers and having our own Almost Famous moment (you know the scene where Stillwater is on the tour bus singing along to 'Tiny Dancer?' It was similar to that, except we were in a limo singing along to Aerosmith). My dancers brought an ice cream cake and sang "Happy Birthday"-- how awesome are they?
- The inside joke of the century: "WE ARE NOT KIDDING ABOUT THIS."
- Bringing all my dancers to the "new" PADV East Stroudsburg, having them meet Maria and Mike, doing a ballet class and having rehearsal.
- Taking everyone to The Crossing to go shopping; my mom joining us. Later having dinner at the Dansbury Depot with all of the above plus my two aunts/uncles and Chad.
- The mini-tech, seeing all the people I've danced before (at PADV, plus in Spirit Moves/Dancescapes/KMSD.
- The performance itself, getting a screaming ovation and a wonderful reception for 'Mad Scene,' dancing in 'Returning' for the first time in three years. Both felt like the ultimate dream come true.
- Doing headstands in Newark airport while waiting for the air train (at four in the morning).
- One of my dancers found out she was pregnant minutes after the limo dropped us off-- in my apartment. It was really special-- a blessed ending to a blessing of a weekend.

There's more. There's so much more. But I barely slept, and I'm tired, and my apartment is trashed and I don't care. I'm blowing off everything until my 6:30 rehearsal in favor of staying home, getting much needed SLEEP, and reflecting on the utter amazing-ness of the weekend.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Notes from a glorious Saturday

-- My Saturday (which, in my mind, is still "today") was pretty fabulous and not at all as stressful as anticipated. Let's take a look:
-- It was THE most gorgeous day outside (sunny and seventy-two degrees). I drove out to the school, taught ballet and pointe (and wore those poor advanced girls out), then proceeded to spend my lunch hour sitting outside Panera re-reading First Love.
-- In the afternoon, I had the first rehearsals for [our story ballet], and they went beyond swimmingly: I set an entire scene (which I choreographed almost completely on the spot, thnxmuch) and half of a second one. The kids at [the school] do a lot of musical theater, and it shows... The three principals and the three other soloists I rehearsed today really brought their parts to life. I was equally amazed to see my quiet, composed advanced student tear across the stage and portray her role as the villan with such conviction. Sometimes, it's hard to believe they're just kids.

-- Afterwards JG and I had dinner at Carrabas, then came back to my place and watched Return to Oz until I announced that I was ready for bed (notice that I'm still awake and writing this. Curious). Now I'm thinking about tomorrow: master class and rehearsal. A fellow dancer asked me today if I'm quitting [Company B]. I said Maybe, I dunno, we'll see. I'm really straddling the fence at this point.

-- For now, I'm sufficiently worn out and finally ready to sleep. See ya later, gator.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Christmas at Upstage Left: A Post of Epic Proportions

Yesterday:
- Morning = ballet class at Hope Stone (with the rest of my ensemble:>), followed by Starbucks with the girls, followed by an insane amount of me running around doing lastminute things and pulling m hair out. Moving on to:
- [BUTTERFLY DANCE ENSEMBLE] HOPEWERKS SHOWING. Oh-my-God, beautiful. The Mad Scene was flawless, Building Nothing went way better than I expected, Aly's solo was wonderful as always, and we got a lot of good feedback. People loved the dances, and both new pieces got way more positive reposes than I'd imagined.
- Afterwards: A mini-party for the dancers, chez moi. Lots of inside jokes, "wrastlin" on my Fun Chair, "decorating" my friend's husband when he fell asleep in my living room, and the piece de resistance: exploding champagne. It was exquisite.
- Went out with JG to a club on the northwest side, where I got considerably imbibed and spent an half hour chatting with an old friend in the ladies room (of all places); then the three of us took over the dance floor for several hours.
- Came home and was given presents by JG ... which I opened, but I only recall a couple of them by now (It'll be a surprise all over again when I get home!).
- Took a cold shower, scrubbed off Wili makeup and managed to get the dred wax (yes, dred wax) out of my hair.
- Packed. Except by "packed," I mean "threw a bunch of random shit into two suitcases, prayed I didn't forget anything important, and called it a night."
- Slept on couch. Order of the Phoenix was playing in my DVD player (and had been since the party), and I didn't bother to turn it off. I can now recite the entire movie line for line.

Today:
- Woke up (at 4am), did last-minute packing, rode to airport with JG, craved french fries in my post-drunken state.
- Lamented the severe lack of french fries available in Hobby airport at 5am, read tabloid magzines until it was time to board ("Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant" was on the cover of five different magazines).
- Slept on plane, occasionally watched the TV in front of me. Landed at JFK . Took a cab ride to Manhattan, during which I thought about how much I don't miss New York and how I'm so glad I don't live/work there anymore.
- Climbed into Mike 'n' Maria's car at 125th and Riverside, rode into Stroudsburg. Wandered Stroud Mall while waiting for Mama Butterfly's arrival. Reunited with Mama B and drive down the mountain in atrocious rain.
- Last- minute shopping at Wal-Mart. Which was quite a production, because you've never seen rednecks in action until you've gone to Wal-Mart (or the Stroud Mall) in Middleofnowhere, PA 2 days before Christmas.
- FINALLY HOME.

Let me just say that I am SO GLAD to be home for the holidays, and equally glad to have a week of vacation. This will give me time to think about our spring rep, which I REALLY need to get going on. I will Poast Moar later. Until then: it's good to be back.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Peace on Earth, Good Will To Men...or something.

I finished a show with [Company A] a few days ago, and my dance ensemble's rep showcase is in two days. I'm taking a break from The Insanity to write this.

I got up at 6 this morning, ran to the bank, called the vet on my way to class and scheduled an appointment. Then I went to class with [another Houston dance ensemble] and took a barre from the wonderful LM. I took off after grande battements, ran to Fiesta, bought stuff to bake cookies; came home and burned the hell out of the first batch (whoops). Started trying to wrap presents/straighten up/pack. Made apartment messier. Ran to the eye doc, picked up new contacts, ran home, grabbed my kitten (literally), arrived at her vet appointment 45 minutes early and was out of there 15 minutes later. Spent the next forty-five minutes (FORTY. FIVE. MINUTES) making the 15-minute trip home. I hate you, Richmond Avenue.

Writing this = me catching my breath. Now it's time to load my the car for tonight's dress rehearsal... and burn CDs, bake more stuff for the reception tomorrow, write out paychecks, and do about 4 other things somewhere in between. Oh, ain't life great?

Okay, back to the insanity. LATER.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Showtime

2 down, 2 to go.

The opening performance was excellent/amazing/wonderful. 100 school children from a community program came as a group, we got a loud and wonderful ovation.

Despite my lethargy when I arrived at call for the 7:30 show, after sewing myself into my pointe shoe and stapling my wig onto my head I was much more awake. Warmup, costumes (sewing myself into my pants), makeup, and we were off. During the curtain speech all five of us "main" dancers (Mom/Amahl and kings) gathered on stage to continue warming-up and bantering. The curtain speech gave me time to get nervous, though once the overture started I was fine. It was a good run--I didn't feel as strong as I did in the matinee; but still good; we had another good audience with a good reaction.

Afterward: After-party on the stage. I introduced my Mom to Treble D (the "other" Amahl)'s mom, so they could converse on the grounds that they have Being Amahl's Mother in common. I could say so much about the shows, but these are the Cliffnotes: it is a wonderful ballet that I am privileged enough to dance in alongside some really wonderful people.

Tomorrow is the last 2 shows. It's weird to think that 24 hours from now I won't be carrying my crutch around anymore.

Notes from dress/tech rehearsal

Last night was our dress/tech, and it went really well. We got costumed and makeuped (and, in my case, wigged), then the five of us got onstage to through the ballet on our own before the rest of the cast joined us. We went through the big “crowd scene” (the scene with all the shepherds and the considerably large and magnificent- sounding live chorus). After we worked through there scene, we started a run. I was surprised, during a the breaks, to walk into the hallway by my dressing room and see my mom standing there (she finally made it to Houston at 6pm; I had to send Roxy and her brother to go pick her up).

We finished the run at 8:30, and it was very smooth for only being our second (yes, second) run with the full orchestra. We fixed a few musical things and were done by 9pm-- which is impressive, seeing as we were scheduled to be there until 10 or 11ish (Those of you in the industry know that a tech rehearsal that gets done early--and with all in good spirits!-- is a highly impressive anomaly).

Woke up to some serious rain-storming going on. Here's to hoping it lets up by the time I leave for the theater.

Two performances today- I’m psyched. Here goes.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

(imported from 'A Long Walk off a Short Pier')

Recaplet:
- Last night was the first rehearsal of Amahl that involved the full cast, opera singers, and orchestra. The music. Sounds. PHENOMENAL. When the full orchestra kicked in at full volume for the climax of "He Walks," it blew the pants of me. I was without pants. Yes, that good.
-Our company director and the music director were interviewed on KUHF today. It was a really neat interview; they discussed the pathos of the story and the emphasis on difference in class and the depth of the characters, primarily the Mother. My name was mentioned in there somewhere, too. :> D, who sings Kaspar, was on air to sing "This is my Box." It was pretty nifty.
- My mom is coming to Houston to see me dance(!). TOMORROW. Provided she doesn't get iced in at Newark.
- Tomorrow = Thursday= day off? Not this time. Class, wig fitting, rehearsal, scramble-round-running-errands break, rehearsal with CSDE, then to the airport.